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Why Do They Call You…?

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There’s not a month that goes by that someone doesn’t ask me, “Why do they call you Chili Bill?” I feel the time has come to answer this question in a simple, straightforward manner to calm the turbulence in these perplexed minds. Said explanation will be put to paper and handed out upon inquiry, a la the method of the one-time owner of the renowned Horse-Cow Tavern in Vallejo, California, who grew weary of explaining what happened to the miniature submarine on the roof of his establishment.

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